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Communicating Is A Two Way Street

By David Chapple

This past summer I had the wonderful opportunity to volunteer at an AAC camp in Colorado.  I had to give a talk to the speech-language pathologists (SLP’s) who were working with the campers about how to appropriately felicitate communication.  Well, oddly enough about two months ago on ACOLUG somebody asked how to interact with a person who uses AAC in a social environment.  So I responded and offered to send a copy of my talk to anybody who was interested in reading it.  The requests were overwhelming so I decided to post it for this month’s column.  So, with that said, I hope everybody enjoys! 

 

I would like to start by telling you how what it was like communicating with a partner before I had an electronic communication device.  It wasn't easy to communicate before I had a device, but I did my best.  When I got my Liberator in 1993 I had no idea what Minspeak was.  I just knew people said it would make me talk faster.  Well, at that point in time I had a manual Bliss board so I figured anything would be faster.  With the Bliss board I had to point to individual words and letters and the person I was talking to had to read everything I pointed to. 

I would like to share the story of how I met my roommate of 20 years. I used to go to a camp much like this in Ohio and Mike, my roommate, worked there for many summers.  For some reason we weren’t ever together.  But I knew of Mike and Mike knew of me.  It pretty much went like that throughout his years at camp.  However, it all changed during my first quarter at Cleveland State University.  I didn’t know Mike was going to Cleveland State and he didn’t know I just started there, until we saw each other in the hall. 

I used to keep my Bliss board in my backpack on my wheelchair so I couldn’t say anything to Mike that first time I saw him in the hall.  He even asked me if I wanted him to get my board out and I shook my head no.  Now I am going to get to the point of this story.  Mike wanted to be a good communication partner and I wasn’t.  I was too nervous to say to get my communication board out.  Needless to say, I got tired of communicating like this and that was when I got the Liberator. I did tell Mike to get my board out and we eventually became the best of friends.  What I am really saying is don’t be nervous, shy or afraid to talk to people. 

Getting my Liberator opened a lot of doors for me both personally and professionally.  However, I found out quickly I had new challenges to face.  I have to admit it was quite overwhelming seeing all of these icons in front of me at first.  But my sister, Mike and I made the best of it.  We started out by learning what I would commonly say, such as can I have a drink and I have to go to the bathroom.  We didn't program those phrases into my Liberator because I wanted to learn how to say the individual words.  Although after about 15 years of using Minspeak I do have “Can I have a drink?” and “I have to go to the bathroom programmed,” but I know how to say the individual words bathroom and drink. Why? Because, what if I need to say something in the bathroom is leaking, or ask a visitor if they want a drink.  I would say it took me about 3 or 4 months to have a meaningful conversation because I studied and practiced a lot. 

Obviously I got over the feeling of being overwhelmed and realized what an AAC device could do for me.  First and foremost a communication device enables me to communicate easily and freely.  Well except in the shower - unfortunately the Echo isn't waterproof.  Yet.  Anyway, I can say anything I want to anybody I want at almost any time.  However, the person I am trying to talk to needs to be patient because it takes me longer to talk. 

Before I get much farther I want to say being a good communication partner has to be a two way street.  Especially if one of the partners uses a communication device or just a manual communication board like I had during my first encounter with Mike. 

For the rest of the time I am going to talk about how speaking people and people who use communication devices can be good communication partners to each other.  I am going to start by how speaking people can improve as a partner, and then I will finish by saying what we need do, as augmentative communicators, to make our communication go more smoothly. 

To my surprise, I don’t have good communication partners when I am speaking with people over the phone from my remote troubleshooting job.  I tell them that I am speaking with a device, so please don't hang up.  But sometimes that doesn't even work.  I have this wonderful communication device, I just ask that people have some patience and give me time to use it.  After years of doing my job I discovered most of the impatient people are speech-language pathologists. 

Now I don’t want to offend anybody here but I am just telling you how it is.  However, if you are a speech-language pathologist and you are at this camp I don’t think you would be impatient and believe what your counterparts believe.  But, like I said some of the worse people I try to help are Speech-language pathologists because I feel they just don’t believe somebody with a severe speech disability can have a job like mine and hold a spontaneous conversation.  Many times they think me calling them is some kind of a joke or they tell me they want to talk to a real person to help with their problem.  I am going to be blunt here, this is very rude and it makes me very angry.  My usual response is, I am a real person.  Isn’t the person using the device you are calling about a real person?  Over 60% of the time they hang up on me after I say that.  When they do that they aren’t hurting me, but they are hurting the person who uses the device in two ways.  I think the first way is most obvious in that they didn’t give me a chance to fix the device and the person is without his or her device until the speech-language pathologist calls back.  The second is with their close minded logic that people can’t form spontaneous sentences and they have to rely on pre-stored phrases.  Of course I can’t answer troubleshooting questions over the telephone using pre-stored phrases because nobody, including myself, can predict what problems they are going to have with their devices.  This also holds true in life in general.  How can you realistically predict somebody will say in a day or in a lifetime?  For this the reason I am against pre-stored phrases.  Now I have to be fair, I have had some parents who acted the same way with me. 

Another problem I have when I am talking to a speaking person is sometimes they ask a question and they forget what they asked while I am typing my response.  This happens a lot when I am in a group of people.  When I finally finish my comment, the topic of the conversation changed four minutes ago.  But now my family and friends know when they hear my communication device beeping I have something to say and they wait for my response.  To defend them, I don’t think people move on or act impatient on purpose, I think that they just don’t understand.  It is our job as augmentative communicators to make them understand. 

Now I am going to turn the tables and talk a little about what you, as a person using AAC, can do to be a good communication partner.  I already touched on that you shouldn’t be nervous to talk to new people.  After all, they could become your friend for life, your husband or wife.  Another thing you have to recognize is what people feel the most comfortable with you. 

Personally my aides, family and I prefer to have my speech output turned off.  What I mean is instead of talking like this (talking one word at a time).  Instead I compose my sentences and say the whole sentence.  But I have been asked by certain people to turn my speech on because they like hearing the building of the sentence to make the conversation flow easier and faster.  Another situation I turn on my speech is when I have to answer questions in a public forum like this.  I find you will keep people’s attention when they hear you are actually saying something every few seconds instead of having two or three minutes of silence.  However, it is up to you to find out what makes people the most comfortable with you.   

The last thing I am going to talk about is true if you can speak naturally, with a communication device or with sign language.  It is about pragmatics, or your nonverbal language.  Just for an example, what do you think I am feeling when I do this (stomping my feet).  I want answers from people using a device and speaking people. My point is that could mean different things and my communication partner has to figure out what I am trying to say.  Now if I stomp my foot and say on my communication device: “The Browns just scored a touchdown.”  They will know I am excited.  On the other hand if I stomp my foot and say: ”Stop doing that.”  People will know I am upset.  The point I am trying to make is it is okay and normal to stomp your feet, fling your arms around or whatever you do to show emotion.  But you have to use your devices to explain your feelings.  Otherwise your communication partner might misinterpret stomping your feet as you are mad at them and walk away.  To sum this up, you need to tell people how you are feeling instead of relying on nonverbal communication. 

July 28 & 29, 2012!

Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

 

Watch for announcements about the AAC Camp and Leadership Program being held as part of the ISAAC 2012 Biennial Conference.  Katya Hill, AAC Institute ICAN™ Talk Clinics Executive Director is one of the Co-Chair for ISAAC 2012.  If you want to receive updates on the program she suggests you sign up at www.isaac2012.org. 

 

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